Adjusting to Change Over 40
Is the fear of things changing in your life keeping you from getting to the next level? If you do not change your mindset and your habits, you will never change your future. I have seen far too many people are stuck in the past but living in the present day.
I am sure you have seen them.
They still have that same old high school hairdo and throwback fashionable style. If you have not seen them, maybe you hear them jamming out to nothing but their lives soundtrack of the good old days. I often wonder why people are so hesitant to change.
It is secure, familiar, and safe. These are the top three answers I tend to produce as I ponder this thought.
Perhaps my mind reaches this result because I have adjusted to change. After all, I have had to move so many times. As a child, I went to several different schools. My favorite memory of high school was attending a new high school each year. The childhood battle of fitting in was on repeat. Did you realize that as children, we were learning to shift?
I had to learn to shift each year. Meeting new friends, learning new neighborhoods, and all the challenging adjustments that came with each location. I bet this is why change is more like a shift to me.
It could also be the fact that I worked in retail for 25 years. Oh, did I forget to mention that? Yes, the joy of the ever-changing world of retail.
As the store manager, each day was different and often unpredictable. Learning to adjust just became second nature. We had to shift each day. On any given day, you can find retail managers crossing their fingers and praying for balance. Because in the current moment, anything, everything, and nothing, could be happening. Successfully shifting to be in the ever-changing moment would at times be the only goal for the day.
I probably do not have to tell you that I trained my staff to be master Multitaskers.
I bet you would never fathom that this type of retail therapy would help? This mindset shift can help you shift your perspective on changing.
Adjust your perspective about change by trying these few mindset shifts.
Be present in the present.
Things may not be going as planned, and that is okay. Find ways to be productive or helpful until you can get back on track. Sometimes in life, you have to meet people and opportunities where they are.
Have the willpower to focus
Do not be sucked into all of the distractions happening around you. Learn to be aware of what is helpful and block out what is hindering. Keep your eye on the task at hand. Emotional control is needed so avoid the drama and stay focused
The desire to learn and grow from it.
Learn to grow in each challenging moment that forces you to shift. Then keep your end goal at the front of your mind. Be inspired by where you are going, and let the past be your motivation.
You may be feeling a sense of empowerment right now from reading this. I hope you do.
What challenges are you facing that admittedly you may or may not be able to overcome?
The world is changing every day. Are you adjusting and changing with the world? Or perhaps you are just along for the ride.
There is a freeing power that comes from change. The feeling you get when you see your reflection in the mirror after a new haircut or changing your hair color. Or the fun in rearranging your bedroom and changing a comforter and decor.
But what do you do when you have to prepare for a life-changing event?
This past weekend I went through my dresser and closets and did some spring cleaning. After being on quarantine for the past 12 months, getting rid of old clothes in my closet is easy. I do not know about you, but this change was a welcomed one. I spent some time in my bedroom closet getting rid of and purging old clothes and items that I no longer need.
Sometimes you need to get rid of old things that are no longer serving their purpose. This process can be emotional. It is a time filled with memories of places I went and reflections on relationships. It is amazing where your mind goes when you are purging. This time cleaning my closet and preparing for change felt a little different. I am downsizing again for the third time.
I am taking a page from my 2020 playbook. One of the best lessons I learned for this time of forceful shifting was simple.
Less is more, and you already have everything you need.
Some days are easier than others to come to grips with change. Cleaning my closet and preparing for the next level made that clear.
Tons of self-reflecting.
Take a look back and skim over the last ten years of your life. You have worked hard and achieved so many things. Just look at where you are today. You may not realize it, but you are capable of change.
I think a lot of people are afraid of change because they fear that they will lose themselves. They fear losing their identity and who they have always known themselves to me.
The truth is the best changes in life result from an intentional change. A decision to move to a new state. Saying I do, to the love of your life, then choosing to be committed to them for the rest of your life. What about the change from taking a risk and quitting a job you hated to start your own business. These are the changes that learning to shift through daily challenges will give you the confidence to manage.
Friends, it is okay to reflect and romanticize the past by hold on to the nostalgic emotions that make you feel happy inside. Just make sure that you have room to fall in love with your future too.
I will give you a pass. Grab your magic crystal ball and take a glance back to the old you.
You may think to yourself and wonder, was I enough? Did I honestly make any progress? Did my actions change anything in my future? Is my life better because of the choices I made? I wonder if I am going to be a better person? Am I different?
The answer is, Yes.
Yes, you have overcome a lot. Yes, you have changed. Yes, you made progress. Yes, you are better. Yes, you are different!
However, on the inside, you are still you.
You are just on the next level.
At this point in my life, I am looking forward to meeting the next version of myself.
Do not be afraid of change. It is in the moments when your life takes a shift you can learn to be prepared to change.
Now, channel your inner Marty McFly and go back to the future. But only in true McFly fashion. Skip passed 2021 and land your Delorian in 2031.
Are you ready to see your future? Go ahead sneak a peak of yourself.
What do you see? An older, wiser, braver, patient, humble, and more obedient version of yourself?
Are you still afraid of taking advantage of changing your future? Or are you thinking that life is good just the way it's always been?
The truth is adjusting to change at any rate is difficult. Things like shifting roles from being a single person to married. Or becoming the boss and no longer the employee. Do you have the confidence required to accept this new position? It requires you to commit to changing. You have to be committed to this assignment. Are you ready to uphold the responsibilities of your new title and complete the mission?
Here are five ways to adjust to the change that's happening in your life.
Focus on being present in the moment and learning from every Challenge.
Don't be afraid to ask for help and learn things you don't know how to do.
Be brave and take risks when your expertise and talents allow you the opportunity to shine.
Don't compare yourself to others. Your chapter 1 is their chapter 20.
Don't expect a free pass. Work hard and pave your way.
This time next year, you will look back on the challenges and be so proud of your growth. You wanted to quit. You believed that this was the end. Believe it or not, you will laugh at everything that you thought to be difficult. By this time next year, you see the results of your transition from one level to the next.
Find your strength and ability to shift during this time of transformation. It is a gift. Not everyone can commit to living life on purpose and seeking their dreams.
But you are.
So stay focused and don't give up.
You're too close to the next level.
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